The first time I submitted a Mississippi top twelve, it was like throwing a June bug down in a flock of chickens. The pot roast was devastated by a barrage of loyalists who maintained it’s “just got Yankee written all over it.” The red velvet cake was accused, convicted, and shot for being a Waldorf recipe, and the pecan pie was mined by a sweet potato. I substituted pound cake for red velvet and sweet potato pie for pecan. The roast lost to stewed greens–which damn near lost out to limas. Here’s the treaty, but rumor has it the pecan pie faction plans a fifth column action out of Belzoni.
Eggs Adrianne
Melt a stick of butter, add a quarter cup plain flour, and cook over medium heat, stirring until the bubbling subsides Whisk in a pint of whole milk and cook over low heat until thickened and smooth.
Stir in two cups fresh leaf spinach and a half-pound sauteed mushrooms. Artichokes are a nice option. Add white pepper and salt to taste. Prepare a pound of picked lump crab meat by heating with butter, lemon juice, and a little black pepper. Add to sauce, spoon over toast, top with poached or fried egg.
Jesseburgers
To each pound 90/10 ground beef, add a quarter cup finely diced onion, two minced cloves garlic, two tablespoons of coarsely-ground black pepper, and a quarter cup of Worcestershire. Form into patties, brush with light vegetable oil and refrigerate for at least an hour. Grill until just done; they should be pink in the middle. Top with smoked cheddar before serving.
Love a Duck
Hunters and fishermen who cook really well – like Billy Joe Cross, bless his soul – should be designated national treasures. Heck, if Japan can buy a tofu maker a house, we should have bought Billy Joe a Cadillac.
If you don’t know a duck hunter, befriend one; they always seem to have an extra fowl in the freezer, and will invariably tell you how to how to cook them. After all, they shot the damn things.
Like many if not most game recipes, this one involves a marinade. Acidic marinades tenderize, and as a general rule are for larger game, but with duck breasts, the marinade is for flavor. For every pound of boned duck breast, use a mix of a quarter cup of soy sauce, two tablespoons each brown sugar and olive oil, a couple of cloves of minced garlic, and a dash or two of black pepper.
Marinate for three hours. Stuff each breast with sliced onion and jalapeno, wrap in bacon, and spear. Grill or broil.
A Proper Fool
Some people make a fool with yogurt or (Lord help us) instant pudding, but to make a proper fool, you must make custard.
For six servings, scald two cups milk. Cool and add a blend of two well-beaten eggs with a half cup sugar and a teaspoon vanilla. Pour into a double boiler. As it begins to thicken, add a tablespoon of corn starch blended very well in a tablespoon of milk. Once very thick, refrigerate until firm.
To two cups sliced fruit, add a quarter cup sugar and macerate for at least a half hour. Stir if you can think about doing so. Layer drained fruit and custard, top with stiff cream. Chill and garnish–a dust of nutmeg is a nice touch–before serving.
Stir-Fry Gizzards
Trim one pound gizzards, poach in unsalted water until tender, and drain well. (Save that beautiful gelatin-laden broth for any number of sauces and gravies, even those pâtés you’ve always wanted to try.)
Heat sesame oil in a wok or large sauté pan until very hot, add garlic, sliced peppers–poblanos and sweet bananas are a suggestion–and gizzards. Toss and stir with a little soy until peppers are cooked to your liking .
Serve with rice and Dixie kim chee.
How to Make a Slugburger
Add two cups potato flakes and a cup of flour to one pound of ground beef. Mix in a quarter cup each of salt and pepper. Use your hands and mix very, very well. Form into patties, on the thin side. Some people—me included—dust the patties with flour before deep-frying in canola oil. Serve on a bun with mustard, pickles, onion. This recipe makes 8-10 burgers.
Hangtown Fry
Crisp three slices thick bacon in an 8-in. skillet. Remove, drain and crumble. Beat four eggs very well, add a half dozen shucked, drained oysters with chopped onions and mild peppers. Helps to stir it a bit. Reheat skillet and add another tablespoon or two of oil to the bacon drippings. When hot, pour in egg/oyster mix and pop into a hot oven until lightly browned. Top with bacon, chopped scallions, and grated hard cheese. Serve with sourdough toast.
Spatched Cornish Hen
This dish is a magical, grilly-fresh single serving for an outdoor evening, Rinse bird with salt water and pat dry. Remove wing tips and backbone with shears. Turn the hen breast side up, spread it open, and whack it a time or two with your fist to flatten it out. Tuck the wings under the hen, slather with oil, and season with pepper and a dusting of sage. Place rosemary, garlic and sweet peppers in the bottom of a skillet, lay the bird over them, and pop onto the top rack of a hot oven (350) until legs wiggle lose.
How to Make a Dagwood
Lay three slices of rye bread out on a cutting board. Smear two of them with a tablespoon each of yellow mustard. Smear the last one with mayonnaise. Top one of the mustard smeared slices of rye bread with 4 slices deli ham, 2 slices American cheese, 2 leaves of iceberg lettuce, and four slices bologna. Top the second mustard-smeared slice of rye with 4 slices salami, a half dozen pickle chips, 3 tomato slices, 4 slices turkey, 2 slices Swiss cheese, and the third slice of rye bread, mayonnaise side down. Stack this unit on top of the first mustard smeared slice. Secure the sandwich with wooden skewers with jumbo pimento-stuffed green olives.
