A Southern Gallimaufry
This recipe is a riff on the sausage sandwiches sold at the Beatty Street Grocery and the Big Apple Inn in Jackson, Mississippi.
Peel the casings from the sausages, break the filling into a heavy skillet—chopped onion would be a nice option—and cook until heated through. Continue cooking until most of the grease is cooked out.
Drain thoroughly and add (drained) slaw. Serve warm on Bunny burger or slider buns with black pepper and Crystal.
The first time I submitted a Mississippi top twelve, it was like throwing a June bug down in a flock of chickens.
The pot roast was devastated by a barrage of loyalists who maintained it’s “just got Yankee written all over it.” The red velvet cake was accused, convicted, and shot for being a Waldorf recipe, and the pecan pie was mined by a sweet potato. I substituted pound cake for red velvet and sweet potato pie for pecan. The roast lost to stewed greens–which damn near lost out to limas.
Here’s the treaty, but rumor has it the pecan pie faction plans a fifth column action from Belzoni.
Egg salad screams of ladies’ luncheons and soda fountains.
Pimento and cheese once simpered in such situations, but thanks to a Southern machismo ethic that makes eating a white bread Vidalia onion sandwich dribbling Duke’s mayo over the kitchen sink a valid display of white collar masculinity. P&C is even found served in micro-breweries where it’s paired with an unassuming yet authoritative amber larger and baked parsnip chips.
Still and all, the South is nothing if not traditional, and while egg salad might certainly be served on pumpernickel at some happy hour buffet in a Pensacola leather bar, for the most part it endures as a staple on occasions with a heavy distaff attendance such as christenings, weddings, and those endless, inevitable funerals.
Though I’m certain some misguided, unbalanced, and violently boring individuals make egg salad with scrambled eggs, the rest of us use whole boiled eggs peeled and mashed (swear to God I knew a gal who used a baby food jar) with Blue Plate mayonnaise to bind.
I like it on the chunky side. Add chopped black olives, finely-chopped celery, and green onion. A dash of vinegar gives it bite, and a little olive oil is a nice touch. Top with ground black pepper, and serve on rye toast with Pilsner, not lager, you knuckle-dragging Neanderthal.
This recipe has a distinguished pedigree; I got it from ex-pat Kentuckian Lynn Tucker, who got it from Tish Clark of Prestonsburg, KY, her amendment of the one in Kentucky’s Best, Fifty Years of Great Recipes by Linda Allison Lewis.
Lynn said, “Years ago, certain bakeries in Louisville used to bake pink and green loaves of bread just for these popular finger sandwiches, a staple at Derby parties, weddings, showers, and appropriate funerals,” which leaves me wondering what an inappropriate funeral looks like
1 8 oz Philadelphia cheese, softened
1 tablespoon of mayonnaise
3 tablespoons of grated cucumber, drained well with a paper towel
1 teaspoon finely chopped green onions with tops
1 teeny tiny drop of green food coloring (the color should be delicate)
a dash or two of Tabasco
“Blend all ingredients together and mix well. Yield: 10-12 servings (I multiply by eight.) You may serve this on trimmed bread as finger sandwiches or as a dip. Please note there is not a single drop of Benedictine liqueur used in this recipe!”
“I like to make a nice pile of these sandwiches on a silver tray lined with a paper doily and garnished with a few cucumber slices and parsley. (Cover with a damp paper towel so your sandwiches don’t dry out and curl before serving. Refresh as necessary.)
“I also put out big crystal bowl of pimento cheese with Carr’s crackers, celery stalks, and salty peanuts to encourage drinking and deviled eggs to prevent or at least stall off utter drunkenness.”
Macerate 4 cups fresh or frozen blackberries with 1 cup sugar; mash and strain. This will yield about 3 cups of syrup. Sift together 1 cup sugar with a tablespoon of cornstarch. Drizzle this mix into a quart of warm half-and-half, add 2 eggs well beaten and a tablespoon of vanilla extract. Simmer until thickened, remove from heat, add 2 cups whole cream, another teaspoon of vanilla, and the blackberry syrup. Whisk until smooth. Refrigerate for at least an hour before processing in the ice cream freezer with a squeeze of lemon. This recipe works well with any berry or stone fruit.
While working in a Florida restaurant, I kept having trouble ordering a yellow-meated watermelon from my produce guy. He said he could never find one, even though I’d seen them in local markets. Finally it came out that with my heavy hill country Mississippi accent he thought I was ordering a melon from some mythical specialty locale in California: “Jala Meadad”.
He even wrote it down that way on his order forms.
Here in the Deep South yellow-meated season is short; you’ll rarely find them marketed before July or after August, and you’ll almost never find them sold in supermarkets, usually only at roadside produce stands.
The variety of yellow meats I find most often here in central Mississippi has broad dark green and light green stripes, though over in Clay County, Alabama, where they have the Clay County Yellow Meated Watermelon Festival, the eponymous variety is an almost uniform light green.
The flesh can range from pale yellow to deep gold. The best contain large brownish black seeds, seeds being an essential ripening agent for the fruit, whose flavor I find sweeter than the reds, offering notes of honey, apricot, and vanilla.
Toss chicken legs in vegetable oil seasoned in equal amounts with black pepper, paprika, sage, and salt. Cook on a rack at 300 for about an hour, turning to brown evenly.
Okay, let’s straighten this out once and for all. Those big orange roots you find in the grocery store are not yams. Got that? As a matter of fact, it’s a good bet that most of the people who just read that have never even seen a yam.
Sweet potatoes came to be called yams because they’re kind of/sort of similar, both starchy/sweet root vegetables, but they’re quite distinct; a sweet potato is far sweeter and much smoother than a yam. The most important distinction is that yams don’t grow in the South, but sweet potatoes do, in glorious profusion.
Sweet potatoes have always been a staple of Southern tables as well as a reliable source of income. The sweet potato is the state vegetable of North Carolina, and the Sweet Potato Capitol of the World is Vardaman, Mississippi. (If tells you any different, they’re a double-dog liar who needs a solid ass-kicking.
Still and all, you’re bound to find cans of yams in many local grocers, but due to USDA requirements, you’ll find “sweet potatoes” somewhere on the label.
So there.
In my experience, the best procedure for boiling shrimp does not involve a rolling boil, which will shrink and toughen the meat. Instead, raw shrimp are dropped into lightly boiling water to cover and stirred until the water comes back to a shimmer. At that point, the meat is cooked through, ready to drain, cool, and serve.
