Cocktail Sauce

Russell had his dander up. “Yancy, you are an effete snob!”

“Because I’m making shrimp cocktails?”

“No, you also wear ankle socks and tuck your t-shirts into your boxer shorts,” he pointed out. “But shrimp cocktails augment such established evidence of your snootiness.”

“There’s nothing epicene about a shrimp cocktail.”

“You even know to say ‘sissy’ six ways from Sunday.’”

“Russ, it’s your birthday party. What do you want for an appetizer?”

“Oyster shooters,” he said.

“I’m gonna tell your momma you’re sleeping with your ex.”

To one cup chili sauce, add one tablespoon each of lemon juice and horseradish, and a teaspoon Worcestershire. For heat, I recommend Crystal hot sauce and freshly-ground black pepper. I don’t recommend garlic. Freshly-chopped parsley gives heft and texture.

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